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Chapter 21: The Lumberjack's Prayer, T-Bone Slim
By T-Bone Slim (Matt Valentine Huhta) - early 1920s
Tune: Praise God, from Whom All Blessings Flow
I pray dear Lord for Jesus' sake
Give us this day a T Bone steak
Hallowed be thy holy name
But don't forget to send the sameOh hear my humble cry, oh Lord
And send me down some decent board
Brown gravy and some German fried
With sliced tomatoes on the sideObserve me on my bended legs
I'm asking you for ham and eggs
And if thou havest custard pies
I like, dear Lord, the largest sizeDear Lord we know your holy wish
On Friday we must have a fish
Our flesh is weak and spirit stale
You better make that fish a whaleOh hear me Lord, remove these dogs
These sausages of powdered logs
Your bull beef hash and bearded snouts
Take them to Hell or thereaboutsWith alum bread and pressed beef butts
Dear Lord, you damn near ruined my guts
Your white wash milk and oleomarine
I wish to Christ Id never seenOh hear me Lord, I'm praying still
But if you won't, our union will
Put pork chops on the bill of fare
And starve no workers anywhere.
Answer to the Prayer - by T-Bone Slim
I am happy to say this prayer has been answered by the old Man himself. He tells me he has furnished plenty for all and that if I'm not getting mine it's because I am not organized sufficiently strong to force the boss to loosen up. He tells me he has no knowledge on dogs, pressed beef, butts, etc., and that they probably are products of the Devil. He further informs me the capitalists are children of his and that he absolutely refuses to take part in his children's squabbles. He believes in letting us fight it out along the lines of industrial unionism.
Yours in Faith
--T Bone Slim
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